Why I came home.
The other day I went to see some ppl about a job. We had a standard discussion, and they said that I should be given a medal for coming home. Medals are always good, but this mentality that is taking over Colombo is a bit odd. Being a child of ‘84 I was born into a country at war and have lived pretty much all my life in a country at war. Now this is not a patch on what the ppl living in the NE face, but we do go through our share of crap. Right through the 90’s we lived through bombs, curfews, school closures, threats, but we batted on. We celebrated when we won the world cup in ‘96, we cried when we lost friends and family to the war, we went to school, went to work, cussed the govt, cussed the LTTE, cheered when Jaffna was captured, fretted when Elephant pass fell, shuddered when there was a big boom and got on with life.
And then there was peace, for four years, an uneasy peace but it was nothing like I had ever experienced before. I could go to Arugam Bay and Trinco (though we didn’t, thankfully in retrospect, bc we were due to go December 24-27th 2004, instead we went to Galle, smart), and even went to Vavuniya and Killinochchi, something I thought I’d never do. The army check points were replaced with corrupt cops seeking bribes for invented crimes. Everybody relaxed. But it was always a shaky peace, and from 2004 it felt like a matter of time before things got messy.
Now things are proper messy, there are serious military offensives going on in the North, bombs left right and centre in Colombo and everyone has got agitated. As far as I’m concerned there has been a sense of inevitability about this. Strangely everyone else seems to think that this is the apocalypse, war is upon as, we’re all going to die. Sure, things aren’t very rosy here but this is pretty much what it was pre-2002, and the country survived then and I’m sure it will survive now. If ppl managed from ‘83 - 2002, there’s no real reason why they have to quit the country now, though that is what every other bugger seems bent on doing, smacks of knee jerk in my book.
Yesterday I was having lunch with a sudda who asked me why I came back, and I said that SL has everything I could possibly ask for, in terms of natural resources, friends and family. And I also want to try give something back. At the moment the best way to do that is to bat on and try to keep moving with normal life. Any country’s best natural resource is their ppl, and sadly we’ve lost so many of them through war and the brain drain, and right now we’re in danger of losing even more. I think the present leadership in the country has almost no hope of providing a real solution to the country’s problems, my real hope lies with the next generation of leaders, the next generation of society as a whole. A more educated, open minded group of ppl who can hopefully learn from the bitter lessons of the post independence era. It’s important to understand that with time attitudes change, ppl change, the fabric of society changes, and eventually leaders change. About 40-50 years ago the vast majority of ppl in developing countries favoured protectionist economic policies. And their leaders implemented these policies. Today things are different. Similarly, when our society becomes more educated, more exposed to the rest of the world, the fabric of society will change and so will our leaders. I’m not saying that the war will end overnight, that we’ll start putting out brilliant economic policies willy nilly, but I’m sure it’s more likely that future leaders will be more willing and will be smart enough to hammer out a proper political and economic compromise that will help SL achieve the potential that it hides so very well.
And for that we need to hang on and contribute to the economy, to thought, to society. When we have kids we need to pass on to the next generation the experience we’ve gained, how not to make the mistakes that previous generations have made. We’ll make our own mistakes, but the key is to learn and improve. And that will never happen if we abandon home. Some ppl believe that we need revolution, I don’t think that can work. You can’t change attitudes of an entire society over night, that happens with time and experience. I think we need to be part of it.
Thats very true, its sad to see people giving up on the country altogether, how many brilliant minds must we have lost to date? But then some of those who did remain were assasinated, either govt or rebels. So how can we blame them for wanting to look out for themselves and thier families?
Anyway then theres people like me, who would love to come back but cant, simply because the infrastructure in our country isnt conducive. I will have to change my line of work and stop doing what I love. Its very frustrating and its a tough decision to make..I’m still trying to decide…
Comment by venusmetamorphosed — August 18, 2006 @ 10:34 am
very true man…people like u, Sachini and many other people I know do deserve commendation…I have to concur with venus, I would love to come back but its an impossibility right now simply because of the line of work I’m in. Also in terms of knowledge, experience there’s a few more things that I have to learn that I can only learn in the West.
That said, 2nd June 2011…come rain, shine, claymores, whatever I’m heading back home cos I figure by then I’ll have enough knowledge/experience to be more effective and still be idealistic enough to think change is possible.
What sucks personally is when the ceasefire was strongest from 2001 to 2004 I wasnt able to make it to SL…the last time I left was in the middle of the Katunayake attack and the next time I came in 2004 it was dicey with the suicide bombing, etc. But as u are I grew up with the war as well and all you can really do is live your life.
Comment by childof25 — August 18, 2006 @ 4:41 pm
interesting.. ur post is reminiscent of an article i read y’day written by Anush for the LMD soapbox which is due to be published next month.
i think it’s great that so many of u who studied abroad want to go back and make a difference, give something back etc. i did feel like that when i left SL in ‘93 but 13 yrs down the line i don’t think i can see myself going back to live in cmb anymore..regardless of the war and the bombs, rather sad.. for me.. but that’s just the way i feel right now.. hard to explain why.
Comment by savi3 — August 18, 2006 @ 5:33 pm
Respect.I want to come back, but when I do, I want to be in a position where I can live relatively independently without depending on my parents for food,shelter and utilities.
I also slightly have the problem that Venus and CO25 are talking about,but I’m hoping that with the necessary qualifications,experience and other little bits that come with it, these problems would be sorted.Hopefully sooner than later..
Comment by Savi — August 18, 2006 @ 7:48 pm
Yep certainly, one of the main reasons ppl live abroad is bc SL can’t sustain their line of work, and also SL simply doesn’t pay well uncless you hit a lucky break. Lots of my friends want to work abroad for a few years, get some capital and experience under their belt and then head back home.
Venus makes a good point about ppl wanting to look after their families and themselves. If I had young kids and had to worry every day whether they’re going to come back home from school safely I’d probably have 2nd thoughts about staying here. But at the moment I have no such worries, so I’ll try stick it out as long as I can.
Comment by ddm — August 19, 2006 @ 1:48 am
i always thought that was part of the attraction about going back home - to live off the parents
i’m joking btw.. i always find it hard having to tell my mum where i’m going and what time i’m coming back and who i’m going with whenever i go home on holiday..
Comment by savi3 — August 20, 2006 @ 9:43 am